Melania Trump instructed Donald on how to best see the eclipse. She informed him that Presidents do not have to wear protective eye ware when viewing the natural phenomena. She further instructed him that if he stared at the eclipse for 5 minutes he would get a “big” surprise. Thinking that this was part of his presidential powers he viewed it for an extra 3 minutes. Afterwards, the president walked into the balcony railing and fell 15 feet to the ground because he was totally blind. He was lead away by secret service agents. When talking to the press later she said that she would be working hard on his hearing in hopes of hitting the trifecta of deaf, dumb and blind!